12.26.2003

12.6.2003

Last night someone memorialized Scout in the snow. The regal statue sits outside in the backyard. It's still snowing and I've got to say that the snow makes me inordinately happy. And what makes me happier is that I can lay in bed under the comforter and stare at it falling out my window, it is the essence of cozy.

12.4.2003

mmmmm, pie. compliments of Kevin on thanksgiving. it was (for it is no longer) a key lime pie lovingly manufactured berry by berry and less carefully devoured by our guests.

10.30.2003

I am oddly transfixed by my showtime rotisserie cooker.

10.27.2003

Months! have passed since I updated anything on here. although an excruciatingly slow dynamic, it's a dynamic nonetheless. In a few short days (shorter even now that we've set our clocks back) I will sit for two days in a row in front of a computer answering medical questions in an effort to attain my license to practice medicine. In preparation...I have, of course, been studying. I also had a really fun dinner party where I got to know a couple of my neighbors a little bit better. That's Scout up there, losing her dignity to a fox terrier. I'd say that's a pretty dynamic photograph

9.25.2003

After what seems like eons I am moved in. This is just a taste of the originality of my apartment. My initial instinct was to paint this over immediately.... now I'm not so sure. Click to see more

8.28.2003

Last night I dreamt I was taking pictures out the window of a moving train. I would see the still image, but was repeatedly unable to to capture anything but blur. I'm quite sure this is completely meaningless.

8.20.2003

Goodbye Tucker

8.18.2003

So this is what theater has come to. it wasn't too hard to imagine that they were really smoking, but it would have been so much more authentic had they really been smoking. It was an excellent play with or without the ash. WTC

8.14.2003

Fortuitously I came home from work early today. I kept breaking out in tears and thought it would be more graceful to do this in the privacy of my own home. Last night, through my grunts and wails, my friend kevin said "...and you just can't believe that the world goes on despite your pain", it's true. but then today the whole northeast came to a standstill.

7.6.2003

I'm working like a dog on this conference I have to give. Pulmonary capillaritis. very interesting. yes, the thought of speaking about something I only know cursorily in a room full of pathologists gives me the panic. anyway, here's a drawing I did of the wedge resection specimen I received many months ago. at the time I didn't think for a second it would be the subject of a surgical path conference, so did I photograph it? nope. didn't even cross my mind.

7.5.2003

Click on the picture to see more

So, feeling a little sad last night I hadn't made any plans to watch the fireworks. While I was walking Scout and Tucker we stopped to talk to (and get treats from) Ritchie, the doorman at the "wedding cake" building on the corner. He told me I could watch the fire works from the common roof of the building on the 30th floor. I went over at 9:20 and he brought me upstairs to a balcony. There were other people there, they were having a party. They were very nice and invited me in when the fireworks were over. Their apartment was phenomenal, not to mention the views. I got the number of their contractor. Ritchie just had a baby daughter. I learned also that he had lost a 2 month old son to SIDS. He's an incredibly nice guy. Now, generally people really bother me, but last night I realized that they're not all bad. it sort of renewed my appreciation for strangers. Ritchie's boss was being a dick and so he couldn't come upstairs to watch the fireworks. I showed him the pictures I took, but it's really not the same.

7.4.2003

Really, why doesn't every home have a hibatchi range?

7.3.2003

This is a picture of the back of the church that the balcony of my (hopefully) future apartment faces. it's very serene. Maybe next week I'll sign the contract. so far... offer accepted, engineer thumbs up, contract at my attorney's office. Still to go...sign contract, get a mortgage, get approved by the board, close and move in! then starts redecorating and renovating!!! god, I can't wait. I can't even let myself dream, yet. what if it all goes to hell? Maybe scout will get lost in the move. It's the day before independance day, my grandmother's birthday. although she died before her birthday last year, this feels like the first 4th of july without her. maybe the pain of her death was still too acute last year for sentimentality. I don't know. Maybe every 4th of july will evoke her absence just the same. What I am looking forward to is the absence of many many people in the city. this place is awfully crowded. Maybe I'll bake some brownies.

6.30.2003

I started to make a slip cover for my couch. I'm not the best sewer, but I'm learning. So, I spent like 5 hours making the cushion part of the cover and 4 minutes after I finished Scout was on the sofa frantically "digging" for god knows what and she ripped it. I'm really mad at her, but she has no clue that she did anything wrong. oblivious. I turned it over so you can't see the rip. like tissue paper, the fabric ripped. Maybe I just picked the wrong fabric.

5.25.2003

I'm still here on my couch on my back. I'm out of medication and pretty fucking miserable. sometimes I can get myself into a position where it doesn't hurt so much, so I try to stay there as long as possible. I'm worried I'm going to destroy my kidneys with the amount of advil I'm taking. I need a trapezius transplant. Last summer kevin and I took trapeze lessons.

5.24.2003

on Friday I woke up with the absolutely most painful spasm in my left neck. I tried to go to work, but ended up in the emergency room. They gave me percocet and valium (I've never had a valium before) and percocet generally makes me puke. luckily and unusually I had had a donut that morning for breakfast so I didn't get nauseous. by the time I left the ER I was able to look to my left a little bit. later, though, that ability left me, and any attempt to investigate my peripheral vision left me in tears. I had to send the dogs away to the brooklyn dog house for the duration of my recuperation, however long that may be. Malcom (the owner of the place) says they're doing wonderfully. I bet they don't even miss me. and I'm running out of valium

5.22.2003

today I was on frozen section. On frozen section day I'm not really allowed outside of the frozen section room. it was an unusually busy day for 'snap' diagnoses, but during a lull I went to the gift shop in the hospital to get cough drops for my cold, not SARS, and came back with all sorts of crafts from my childhood. I made this potholder when I got home that night. it's a houndstooth pattern in honor of my hounds

5.17.2003

On my birthday Kevin and I went to get pedicures. Here I am trying to avoid having my picture taken. I look pretty relaxed. I love getting a pedicure, but I chose the wrong color and the woman tending to my feet had to go choose another one for me. it was my birthday after all and so I didn't feel to terribly guilty.

4.22.2003

right this second both dogs are as still as this door-stop.