Briefly Told Lives

Introduction

An Interview with the Author

Excerpts:
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  • "On a Railroad Bridge, Throwing Stones," Part One
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  • "On a Railroad Bridge, Throwing Stones," Part Two
  •  
  • "The Mother," Part One
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  • "The Mother," Part Two

    Letter From the Editor

    Editorial: Having Our Say

    New Releases

    Authors On Tour

    Feedback

    Ordering

    Gay/Lesbian/Feminist Bookstores Around the Country

    The Mostly Unfabulous Homepage of Ethan Green

     




    Briefly Told Lives "On a Railroad Bridge, Throwing Stones," Part Two

    By C. Bard Cole
    From Briefly Told Lives

     

    Dan kicks some gravel across the tracks, through some of the rusted-out holes. "It's not easy," he says, kind of to Todd but kind of to me too.

    "Seems easy enough to me," Todd says. I used to make up stories for each of my cars, giving them personalities I'd intensify with coats of my mother's nail polish or touch-up paint from my father's toolbox; that was the game to me. Todd pushed them along, concentrating on the noise he'd make with his mouth as he forced them to navigate hairpin turns in the dirt. I didn't get it, but we played together anyhow.

    "C'mon Todd, this is weird, okay." Dan's eyes meet mine. An imaginary mirror: our first other homosexual. You think that this look might be recognition, but it's not.

    I shift my gaze to Dan's feet, ratty blue high-tops cracked around the sole, him shifting his weight from toe to heel, right leg to left. "I think I'm still going to go home," I say, tilting into a stumbly walk. "I feel weird."

    Dan springs forward, turning me in the opposite direction as he grabs the edge of my T-shirt sleeve. "Don't…" He shakes his head, upper lip shrugged over teeth. At Todd he barks, "You asshole."

    Todd propels himself to his feet, pushing off the middle bar of the railing. He ambles over to us, unfazed, and walks in the direction of the road, just like we walk every day when we come back here to smoke joints. "I don't see what the big deal is," he says as we start to follow him at the same dull pace. "You want to go on forever and not ask?" He talks pointedly but at neither of us in particular, not even looking at us. "You don't ask, you never know."

    "That's easy for you to say. You don't know what it's like." Dan puts his hand on the back of his neck, looking very adult. "You okay?"

    I'm feeling a little better. "Yeah. I'm okay. I just want to–"

    "It's not easy for me," Todd suddenly interjects, looking back over alternate shoulders at each of us in turn. "If this gets out people are going to call me a fag lover." The severe tone contrasts with the beaming grin he's wearing, walking ahead of us down this path.

    "Fag lover?" Danny snorts. "And how's it going to get out?"

    "I dunno," Todd says. "Don't ask me. Y'all are the fags."


    Copyright © 2000 C. Bard Cole.

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